I appeal to your collective vegan wisdom! Any ideas? Thanks. :)
[Addendum: Spam comes in a can and is generally sliced into slabs, so the form factor is similar to a slice of tofu. The c olor is a sort of medium pink, like ham, which is, I believe, the main ingredient. I've never actually eaten it myself, but taste is irrelevant, anyway. The omnivores in the cast plan to use a "ham loaf" in place of the Spam, having opted out of a veggie option. I am part-amused, part-chagrined.]
Also, I'm in Boston. So any specific product must be available here, which sadly does narrow things down.